The Lane Train

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Archive for the ‘New York’ Category

Friday’s Political Roundup

Posted by thelanetrain on October 24, 2008

Hah, this actually happened last week (I think) after Sen. John McCain mistakenly walked off the stage in the wrong direction (and not, according to popular belief, by trying to initiate a game of grabass with Sen. Obama).  But aside from this attention grabbing (pun intended) picture, two very important political items occurred this week, one local and one bizarre.  Details after the jump.

After The Jump: A mayor for life and a Hockey Mom goes to Neiman?

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Has The Hills Gone…Downhill?

Posted by thelanetrain on October 24, 2008

It’s still the number one show on MTV, but chances are, you’ve probably been skipping The Hills to watch actual scripted teenage drama.  Yes, there are definite signs that the juggernaut of all reality shows is slowly backsliding like the folks on Celebrity Rehab.  In this post, I’ll try to explain some of the unsettling omens that the fantasy playworld of Lauren, Whitney, Heidi and Audrina may soon cease to exist.

After The Jump: Evaluating The Hills post stardom

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Posted in Celebrities, New York, Pop Culture, Television | Tagged: , | 1 Comment »

This Just In: People Are Watching Gossip Girl

Posted by thelanetrain on September 23, 2008

Spotted: A surefire sign that Gossip Girl will be ruling the airwaves for a few more seasons.  Entertainment Weekly reported that the teen soap which runs on the CW reported a series high rating of 3.7 million viewers last week.  Not only that, but the show helped the CW become TV’s #1 network for women and adults aged 18-34 that night.

So what exactly has been happening on the juicy show that the kids can’t seem to stop talking about?  The kids are back for their senior year of high school, but not without some fun in the sun, Hamptons style.  We see Nate and some MILF playing around while toying with Vanessa’s emotions, Blair fawning over some rich Lord guy, and Dan and Serena on and off and on and off again.  Chuck is wallowing away in sorrow over his inability to keep Blair, Jenny’s been overworked at her internship with Blair’s mom and Lily is unhappy with her marriage to Bart Bass.  Oh, and Rufus has a new love?

Can’t wait to see what happens next week

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O Hai, Did Ur Money Die Today?

Posted by thelanetrain on September 15, 2008


So unless you’ve been living under a rock, a member of some Mideast Oligarchy, or part of the production staff of SNL, then you probably already know that today might has well been called “Clusterfuck Monday”.  It started off this weekend as Lehman Brothers, one of the world’s leading investment banks and repository of six-figure earning white collar douchebags, failed to find a sucker peer institution to save it from total collapse and instead filed for Chapter 11 bankruptcy.  As if that wasn’t bad enough, Bank of America bought Merrill Lynch for a mere $50 billion, and essentially turned precious, precious Lynch stock into worthless sheets of paper.  Even worse, this all comes off the news that Washington Mutual’s stock fell below $2 per share at the end of last week and is seeking a $4.5 billion loan for its reserves, and AIG is scrambling to restructure itself after its stock value was more than halved on Friday. So there’s no way this can get any worse.

Yes it can.

So how much damage was inflicted on the markets today?  The closing bell hasn’t rung yet, but so far, things are shitty.  The Dow dropped over 400 points and already both candidates are pointing fingers.  It’s an all out panic as investors are in a tizzy and volumes of precious stock and mutual funds are slowly turning into worthless piles of financial jargon.

On the flipside, at least the Coen Brothers are happy…

Posted in National, New York, Politics, The Economy | Tagged: , , , | 3 Comments »

Heidi and Spencer to Open Bar in Manhattan, Spencer Won’t Attend Unless He Pays Himself Club Fees

Posted by thelanetrain on August 29, 2008

The new season of The Hills is only two episodes in, but there’s already bi-coastal drama unfolding.  Unfortunately, it’s not going to play out on the small screen…yet.  According to Gawker and W (from which this lovely picture came), real people Heidi Montag and Spencer Pratt are apparently opening a bar, oh excuse me, “upscale sports lounge” in Manhattan’s Murray Hill.  And in a Martha Stewart-esque move to completely synergize their lifestyle into a brand, they are naming the bar “The Hill”.  I swear to god I am not making this shit up.

Unfortunately, The Hill is still under construction, as the picture clearly shows.  Too bad the Real World crew from Brooklyn can’t party there yet.  But, like, whatevs, the place will no doubt be crawling with bros, or rather, “brahs”, and hot Heidi look-a-likes, like NYC celebutard Tinsley Mortimer.  I wouldn’t be surprised if the Whitney Port Hills spinoff follows Whitneys totally real, unscripted life as she mysteriously ends up at The Hill night after night after nifght…

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Real Worlders Finally Descend on Brooklyn. Everybody Hide!

Posted by thelanetrain on August 15, 2008

This picture from Newyorkology shows a bunch of faux-hipsters walking down some abaonded Red Hook street with a camera crew guiding them along the way, and clearly, it appears to be the Real World Brooklyn crew.  Gawker has some lovely cast bios on each of the seven drunk therapy cases housemates and provides insight into what they’ve done so far during their stay.  Predictably, they go clubbing, barhopping, they meet/talk to/fuck the locals (and each other), and it appears that for the most part, the picture above and the ones on the linked site are some of the only times you will be able to see them sober.  Personally, its always gratifying to see how they film those “walking” shots (as these photos explain).

I’m not sure how long they’ll be in town for, but if anyone runs into one these seven strangers picked to live in a house together, contact me!

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Is The Daily News In Trouble? Or Desperate? Or Both?

Posted by thelanetrain on August 13, 2008

I’m not sure what to think about The New York Daily News new marketing campaign, but it is certainly making the city’s #2 tabloid paper looking more and more desperate.  It all started when the Daily News called my house to get me a low-rated subscription, and begged to keep me on the phone.  Then I saw them cutting their prices while on sale at a local newsstand, offering a reduced price if it was paired with a purchase of polar opposite Wall Street Journal.  But the icing on the cake was seeing a vendor make his way up and down a 4 Train peddling the paper and hollering for customers.  It was just like those guys who sell candy for the Harlem Basketball League, or beggars asking for change, but from “New York’s Hometown Paper”.

Gawker keeps telling us that printed journalism is dead, or on its way to a slow painful death at least.  But this latest show of desperation by the Daily News is getting me legitimately concerned.  How can a paper that nobody takes seriously get any lower?  Maybe they should consider being bought out by a major corporation.  Then they could become a vindictive, snarky, and thoroughly entertaining outlet of corporate America and the conservatives.  Like this shitty rag!

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Mary-Kate Olsen: Actress, Socialite, Pusher?

Posted by thelanetrain on August 5, 2008

Everyone knows how crazy the Olsen Twins are, or really, how crazy Mary-Kate Olsen has been lately.  When we last saw her, she was locking lips onscreen with Sir Ben Kingsley in “some little indie film that nobody’s gonna see“.  Now she’s being shoved back into the media circus again, but this time, as suspect #1 in the investigation of Heath Ledger’s death.  FOR REAL?  What would Danny Tanner say?

After The Jump: Immunity, OxyContin, and why MKO is under fire.

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Less Than 24 Hours Until Total Doomsday

Posted by thelanetrain on July 24, 2008

Alright New Yorkers, listen up.  Whatever you do tomorrow, avoid Rockefeller Center, and avoid it like the plague.  Why?  Oh nothing, it’s just that teen pop sensation and recent troublemaker Miley Cyrus will be hitting The Today Show for a free concert tomorrow.  Yes, you heard me right.  So if you’re a mother, prepare to be woken up at 3am tomorrow morning so you can bring your teenage and tweenage girls out to Manhattan to catch a glimpse of the megastar, all while battling tens of thousands of anxious young fans.

And if you commute through the area, consider changing your route.  Chances are you’re probably not going to make it into work tomorrow if you even think about going within a 4 block radius of the plaza.

(Photograph via The Guardian)

Posted in Music, New York, Television | Tagged: , , , , | Leave a Comment »

Real World Will Cement Red Hook as New York’s Scariest Neighborhood

Posted by thelanetrain on July 23, 2008

Yes, yes, we all know that MTV’s stupid drunk juggernaut The Real World is going to be in Brooklyn very soon, but like, stuff keeps happening, you know?  At first, the Real Worlders were going to be living in an exclusive Brooklyn Heights penthouse loft, but according to Gawker, renovations were coming along a little too slow for the producers’ tastes, so they decided to move the cast to a giant pier building in an up-and-coming neighborhood that’s getting gentrified by the minute: Red Hook.  So the lovable neighborhood that was once home to stevedores, hookers, and underground drug trafficking is now home to an Ikea, Fairway, and soon, seven drunk twenty somethings who love to bitch and fight.  Sweet.

(Photograph via Klarinetic)

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